My Final Journey

This beautiful letter was written by one of our patients, Fred, to his hospice physician:

When people are asked "how would you prefer to die?" they almost always say "by passing away in my sleep." Once, that was also my response.

I now see and live life quite differently. I have learned, post my diagnosis, you must experience the final journey to truly appreciate it.

The final journey I am referring to provided me, and maybe you, the ability to feel, to do, to observe, to cry and to wonder. To be held or very simply touched. Questions were asked without reservations while answers simply seemed to flow my way. It really was a wonderful experience.

I was looked at ~ positively; I was listened to ~ intently; I was hugged ~ with meaning; I was helped ~ continuously and, yes, ~ it all felt so very good. Some friends reached out while others stayed overly reserved. Everyone seemed to find or at least blend into their own comfort zone.

In her famous book On Death and Dying, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross identified five distinct stages (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance) a person normally follows in their final journey.

It became clear to scholars those very same stages identified for a dying person also applied directly for the loved ones and friends of those who were actually dying.

I truly enjoyed, yes enjoyed, my journey. The time it took me to do some processing also provided the quality time my family, friends and acquaintances may have needed to do their own searching. Time I believe well spent.

My journey has finally ended. Although yours may be far off and nowhere in sight, it still looms to surface surely some day.

May your final journey follow smoothly in the footsteps you helped mold for me. You have truly assisted in blending various segments of mine into a wonderful experience I now cherish and so dearly appreciate.

Remain well and we shall meet again.
Fred